Ang Pagbubuo ng Ugnayan: Cards for Connection
Sharing a meaningful and liberating project that integrates my values of curiosity, creativity, connection and contribution :)
They’re finally here! And all in due time. :)
Ang pagsibol ng pinunla
Story time!
Ugnayan feels like an integration or pagbubuo: of the work I started to do over a decade ago in bringing community together for reflections and conversations on mindful living through Muni; of the continuous self-discovery work + nerdery on wellbeing science, Filipino language & culture through my personal Pagbubuo posts; of my ongoing practice of creating brave and safe spaces for individuals and teams with Haraya Coaching. And while I’ve probably been wanting to make cards like these for years, it feels like they’ve come at just the right time. 😊
I don’t remember the last time I’ve felt this way about a piece of work I’ve put out there. “This way” meaning a profound sense of pride and peace — at least now that it’s out there. This work feels very ako and buo. 🤍
I also remember how leading up to our online launch a few days ago, on November 22, my co-creator Kookie and I were anxcited-ly (anxious+excited -ly) chatting with one another about what we were feeling as we were putting this piece of work out there.
There was something quite nerve-wracking for me about putting something out there in this permanent, uneditable printed form. It felt like a similar kind of nervousness about when I first got my (tiny) tattoos. It felt so permanent and defining. What if it’s not right? What if I realize later on that I did something wrong? What if other people don’t get it?
But then as with my tattoos, it is shaped by who I was before it, and it may guide who I continue to become, and yet, it is not all of who I will be — that remains to be known by me and others. It helps to remind myself that this project is a snapshot of ourselves in this moment in time. I need to remind myself of this all the time, with most of the work I put out there.
There are things that I could nitpick or things I might want to revise here and there (I was revising things here and there up our deadliest deadline for proofing with our printer), but I can say right now that I am at peace with what we’ve put out into the world. There will always be room to improve upon the work. At the same time, this one piece of work does not define all of me and my potential.
Buo habang patuloy na nagbubuo. Leading up to the launch, it also felt very much like this is just the beginning. Unlike other work perhaps that one might just “ship out”, it feels like our continuing engagement with the cards and the coming experiences people will have with the cards will deepen the connection, learning and growth from this experience. Ugnayan is the gift that keeps on giving.
So even though we were uncertain with how people would respond to it, we were certain that we were really proud of this work, and that it was a project filled with a lot of joy and play, and intention and meaning.
Ang pinag-ugatan ng Ugnayan
Ano ang sadya ng paglikha ng Ugnayan?
In experiencing the deck, you’ll find the intention for why these cards were made:
How did we arrive at the themes and questions for the deck? It was partly formed through the synthesis of things I’ve learned about what contributes to wellbeing, more recent explorations in Positive Psychology1, and my intuition (which psychologist Daniel Kahneman might say is “thinking that you know without knowing why you do”).
I could write a much longer essay about the different themes, but I’ll save that for other posts in the future, as I intend to tackle one theme in each month of the coming year. 😊
Bakit mahalaga ang proyektong ito sa akin?
In the work that I do, I like to be guided by the values I hold most dear. This project is personally meaningful to me because it was created in alignment with my values:
Curiosity
I live for the questions, and I love learning and being able to share and discuss what I learn with others — hence some of that on this Substack too.
I’m all for encouraging people to ask themselves and others more questions. The deck leads with questions, and invites others to do the same. And sometimes clearer answers can be found in asking the right questions. That began for me in asking people to “Muni on this”, and it’s become more core to my identity now as a coach as well.
And I just leaned in: What if we just tried this out?
Creativity
I like “figuring things out”.
I found a lot of joy (but also a bit of pressure at other times, I won’t lie) in coming up with the themes for the deck. I flip flopped quite a bit (I tend to overthink, and so I tell collaborators and colleagues they need to reign me in) until I finally got to what I felt most encompassed what I knew about what contributed to wellbeing — at the time that I finalized them anyway. (Daming disclaimer o.)
Working out the language also felt like an abundant supply of Sudoku puzzles I needed to solve, one theme and one question at time. And yes, that was joyful! 😁
I also found joy in sharing some of my visual ideas with Kookie — just giving her some broad strokes or directions by saying I wanted an “Ugnayan zodiac” to represent the different themes, the relaxed playfulness of Shel Silverstein’s illustration style, and then later also sharing my ideas for nature-inspired symbols for each theme. And that was all I needed to say, and then Kookie did what she does best. She played with those ideas, and the result was perfect in its intentionally imperfect way, and it felt like we had a mindmeld with the direction she took, and icons she made for the themes, the Gabay sa Pakikipag-Ugnayan or connection guide, and the packaging.
Connection
It’s the essence of the cards. Ugnayan is connection. This has always been important to me in living a more mindful life, and in being in community with others.
See more in Kookie’s stories in the next section.
Ang kwento ni Kookie, ang aking kalaro
Kookie made an IG essay on stories behind the making of the cards on the day we launched, and I’m just going to put it here rather than repeat everything because +1 to this behind-the-scenes creative process and feels. And I appreciate having her voice in this post too. 😊
Reading through Kookie’s stories made me feel really moved by how connected she felt as this project evolved — with the project itself, with herself, with me, and with those that she’s experienced the cards with. It’s all I ever wanted. 🥹
And that fulfills my value for Contribution. I’m glad this project has enriched my life and that of my collaborator’s so far, and I look forward to the ways it can bring intention, joy and growth to others too, each time they experience the deck. 😊
We have a pre-order offer that gets you P100 off on each deck, or a free deck for every 5 decks that you order! 😸 Visit bit.ly/ugnayancards to learn more.
This offer will be valid until November 30 only, and decks will be shipped out by the week of December 10.
We’d also love it if you connected with @ugnayancards on Instagram!
I recognize the limitations of my mostly Western references here, and so I’m actively trying to learn more about Filipino perspectives of wellbeing or ginhawa. I recently joined the 47th Pambansang Samahan sa Sikolohiyang Pilipino (PSSP) conference, which also served as the 2nd national conference for Ginhawa, and I intend to share more of what I’m learning from that space here in the future.